Alexa Gelles

In the Media

5 Tips for Dealing with Jealousy in a Relationship

January 21, 2025

The Counsellor Behind The Blog
Hey, I’m Alexa! I’m a Registered Clinical Counsellor based in Vancouver, B.C. I’ve curated this blog specifically for you to answer your most pressing questions about counselling and building healthy relationships.

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Reflecting on My Experience

Looking back on my early marriage, I can’t help but think about how much I struggled with jealousy in the beginning. My past relationships had left me with a lot of trust issues, and I couldn’t shake the fear that my partner might hurt me the same way. I started projecting that mistrust onto my new relationship, constantly seeking reassurance from my partner just to manage those feelings. At first, he was happy to offer comfort, but over time, it created dependency, and resentment started to build. I realized that I needed to do some serious personal work to build trust in myself and in my relationship.

Key Insight

What I learned through this process is that trust isn’t something that can be fixed with words alone. Yes, it’s natural to want reassurance from your partner, but words can only go so far. Trust is built through consistent actions over time—actions that show your partner is reliable, sincere, and committed. This doesn’t happen overnight, but with effort and patience, it can be achieved.

Personal Experience

I had to take a step back and work with my own therapist to unpack my insecurities. Working through my jealousy and fears wasn’t easy, and it didn’t happen quickly. But in the end, it led to a secure marriage where I no longer question my partner or rely on constant reassurance. I had to learn how to trust myself, and that’s what made all the difference.

Featured Article

I recently shared my experience and practical tips for dealing with jealousy in relationships on DatingNews.io. You can read the full article here: 5 Tips for Dealing with Jealousy in a Relationship, where I dive into ways to regulate your emotions, challenge unhelpful thoughts, and stop the jealousy cycle from taking over your relationship.

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